By the time you’re finished reading this post, approximately 525 people will have died.
By the time you get through today, 151,600 people will have taken their last breath.
Every time you see another year of life, 55.6 million people won’t get the chance to because they’re dead.
To put that all in perspective for you, you’re pretty darn lucky to still be living. Every single second two people die, and for the past how many years of your life, you haven’t been one of them.
Do you feel lucky that you’re alive?
When your alarm clock startles you out of your sleep at 6:00am to get dressed for work or school, and you feel that dejection that comes from waking up so early when you’re so tired, do you feel lucky?
As you sit in bumper-to-bumper traffic in the stifling heat on your commute to your “amazing” corporate job, do you feel lucky?
When you file into your college classes to learn a set of courses that don’t really interest you, but that you were told will “make your life better,” and “give you a stable future,” do you feel lucky?
When it’s the last week of the month and you barely have money to make ends meet until you get your next paycheck, do you feel lucky?
When you calculate how much student loans you owe just to get a piece of paper that will “validate” you, do you feel lucky?
If you feel lucky to be alive in any of those situations, this post isn’t for you. That means you’re comfortable, content or pleased. This won’t be your cup of tea.
I’m writing to the people who aren’t comfortable. Those who aren’t happy with where their lives currently are. Those who definitely don’t feel lucky.
It’s more than just your comfort zone that’s hindering you
This article is going to be a deep dive into what to do when you don’t feel comfortable, but you feel stuck.
When you feel like the walls are closing in on you and you don’t know how to align your current life to the one you escape to when you fall asleep.
I’m talking about feeling stuck mentally (and maybe even physically, if you feel tied to a situation that you can’t seem to escape.)
Sounds like you? Great.
The very first thing you need to realize is that the way your life has nothing to do with anyone else, and has everything to do with you.
You must be thinking, “What on earth is Devonnie on about now?” Haha, trust me on this one. You’ll get a mental shift once you can realize that your life comes down to perspective, and how you interpret situations.
If I ask you to make a list of why you’re where you are in life, what will you come up with? Will you blame your boss for laying you off, or giving you more hours? Will you blame school for the unrealistic deadlines and pressure?
Who will you peg with the responsibility of “ruining your life” or “not giving you the opportunities you need”? The government? The “system”? Maybe you’ll blame things that you have no control over like where you were born, which school you went to or the way everyone treats you.
In other words, you’ll want to give me an excuse.
Everything I’ve mentioned above is an excuse, and as humans we LOVE excuses. Nothing feels quite as good as blaming somebody else and relinquishing the responsibility.
I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you’re entirely responsible for how you deal with what happens to you in life. Sorry 🙁 (I’m actually not.)
Realizing that is the first step to getting unstuck.
Examine reality, you’ll find out that time isn’t a renewable resource
“Hey, can I have a large order of time please? Preferably separated into seconds and not minutes,” said no-one ever.
You can’t just walk into a store and buy time, which I’m sure you know. But you don’t seem to be acting like it.
You’re literally killing yourself by wasting time, but you will never realize it until you’re staring death in the face, and you have nothing to show for your life apart from a TRUCK-LOAD of excuses. (Or maybe a grave-full of excuses, right?)
The second step to freeing yourself from feeling stuck, is start regaining your time. I’m not telling you to go quit your job, or drop out of school – depending on your situation, that might be unrealistic and stupid.
What I am telling you is to start doing little things each day that can help you regain your time. This can be as simple as cutting down the time you spend mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, or lurking your way into the depths of Instagram.
The average person spends 1 hour and 40 minutes on social media each day. In that time, almost 12,000 people will have died.
Once you free up some time by cutting down on habits that aren’t adding any value to your life, it makes room for the next step to getting unstuck. Replacing those habits.
Start developing habits that will benefit you in the long run
The very first post I published on this blog nearly seven months ago, talked about how important your habits are.
You feel stuck because TONS of tiny bad habits culminate to create that suffocating feeling you have. As humans, we are what we do most often.
Therefore, you need to develop habits that your future self will thank you for.
One such habit that everybody needs is how to handle money. If you can’t create a budget and stick to it, then you’ll always be struggling to make ends meet. Saving is a crucial part of life. (If you need saving tips, here are three.)
Useful habits like those will make all the difference. Like my doctor once told me, “Maturity is the ability to defer happiness from today, for a greater happiness tomorrow.”
In addition to developing good habits, you also need to learn skills. The more skills you have the more valuable you are, and the more opportunities you can take advantage of.
I experienced this in my personal life, pretty much first hand. In ninth grade, I taught myself CSS & HTML5. At the time, I learnt it because I had a tumblr account and wanted to make free tumblr themes to get more followers. At the time, tumblr followers were important to me.
However, that CSS & HTML5 knowledge came in VERY handy in college. I was doing a computer science course, and the skills I taught myself put me aeons ahead of the class. In fact, I could drop out without a second thought to take advantage of a life-changing internship opportunity at a huge company here in Jamaica, just because I had taught myself most of what I was PAYING to learn at school.
My point? Learn a skill on the side that interests you, and you’ll be surprised at where it takes you. With the advent of YouTube and Google, there isn’t anything you can’t teach yourself.
You just need the time and the motivation.
That leads me to my next point.
Just suck it up, and decide to make a change in your life
Ever heard the saying, “The best time to plan a tree is 30 years ago, the second best time is now”?
That illustrates the point I want to make here. It doesn’t make sense you sit and gripe about the time you’ve lost or how far ahead other people are in achieving their goals.
What matters is that you start now, because it’s always better to have started than to never start at all. Remember, you’re going to be one of the two people who die every second one day.
Don’t die with your dreams, you’d be doing the world a huge disservice.
You need to make the decision to change your life. Every positive action that will improve your life stems from the decision to change it. If you don’t definitely decide to change and start doing what you need to do, you’ll always be stuck.
Mark my words. You’ll always be stuck.
I don’t want that for you.
Your life isn’t over until you take your last breath, so here’s what you need to do. Get out a pen and paper and write down everything that you want to achieve in life. Set some goals, and follow the steps I set out in this article.
You’ll be surprised at what can change. Contrary to what you think, you don’t have much time left.
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